(insert uncomfortable laugh here)

Good thing the election wasn't divisive or anything.

I mean that Bushie... sure is a uniter and not a divider, eh?

Oh wait.

He used that during the first election, which he, by the way, lost.

Remember that? Ahhh, back in the good ol' days. As Jon Stewart says, I kind of miss voter fraud. Now I have to live with the fact that 51% of my fellow Americans either lack the ability to absorb and disseminate information, or are really just as neoconservative as that greasy little cabal running the country.

This election? Vote for Bush or we'll all die, and now that Bush has gotten a 1% majority, he's got a "mandate" to drill in the last frontier and deny basic human rights to 10% of the citizens of my country.

That is so awesome. You keep on keepin' on, Georgie boy.